The Expert’s Sprained Wrist: A Guide for Overwhelmed Parents

To Our Bluebird Community

It has been a minute. A long minute.

If you have been wondering where I have been - or assumed I fell into a pile of laundry and never came out - you are not wrong to ask. Life has a funny way of shifting our priorities without asking for permission first.

I recently took what I am calling a sabbatical. But if we are being honest, it was more like every time I dipped my toe back into my business, Life said, "Not yet, Sue. Family first."

2025 has been big in the way that makes you tired in your bones. I have been supporting my aging Mum through a difficult surgery and recovery. At the same time, I was being a rock for my teen through a whirlwind year of choices and consequences, as well as growth.

Before you lean in for details, I am going to put a boundary right here: the specifics of my teen’s challenges are not my story to tell. All I can do is continue to be her safe place, not her narrator.

But I can tell you about how being that rock affected me, even with all the personal development work I have done on myself. And, my examples in this blog (about teens) are generalised, not necessarily what my teen went through.

I am also so very proud of her resilience: how she traveled through 2025 and how she has entered 2026. There is a lot still going on, however the whirlpool sinking sensation has leveled out for us both, as we each grew from the journey both in our relationship and in our medical education.

We are always growing. And, whenever we get too comfortable, life throws a curve ball designed to take us out of our comfort zone and gain even more growth by having the resilience to walk through fire and survive.

The 14+ Visibility Gap

Let's chat about the impact of the Australian medical privacy rules for a second. Once your child hits 14+, they are labelled as a mature minor. Which means "if a doctor deems a young person has sufficient understanding and intelligence to fully comprehend the treatment and its risks, they can consent to their own medical care without parental involvement". Your child can suddenly say "I don't want mum in here" and medical providers will not share information with you without your teen’s consent.

Now I understand why mature minor privacy exists. Teens deserve autonomy and dignity as they grow into adults, especially in some cases when parents' values are being inflicted onto the child - eg whether they support contraception, abortion and other medical concepts that sometimes parents and children are not in agreement. I also understand abuse can occur and the mature minor needs to get to safety and report their care givers.

But as a parent, when your gut tells you something serious is going on, it can feel like you are fumbling in the dark - guessing what's going on, frustrating your teen with questions - while still being expected (under the law) to keep your teens safe, advocate properly, and make the "right" medical calls.

2025 was a whirlwind of decisions I made with a blindfold on, hoping it was the right choice for her, almost panicking with the lack of information given, having to deal with her fall out, while not allowed to know or understand the cause. It was a weird, overwhelming headspace to find myself in. Parenting a teen who needs your help but turns to professionals whilst keeping you in the dark. Because your love for them is always there and the responsibility for them stays, you're sorely tested over and over again. I often thought - "has our bond been broken", "am I no longer her safe place", "why won't she tell me what's going on". Parents are left wondering how they (and their teens) will come through to the other side.

If you are in this season too: you are not alone and most importantly I have discovered - you are not failing as a parent. You are doing your best inside a system that can be incredibly hard to navigate. It is okay to feel the weight of that. And, the very fact your teen is living their life, and letting go of you, is proof that you have done & are doing a good job.

This may not be how you envisaged their life to go, but these are their lessons to learn. Your job is to be there when they turn to you, and to make sure that in the meantime you haven't pushed them away because of your fear and overwhelm.

Quick Tip: Two Questions to Cut Through the Noise

When everything feels messy and the "what ifs" are swirling around your head like a storm, ask yourself two questions:

1."What (about this) is in my control?" Then, with that in mind,

2."What is the next step I can take today (not the whole plan)?"

Write down one action that brings you back into steadiness today. It could be a call, a walk, breathing slowly, a boundary, a call to your coach, partner or a friend. It could be letting friends go who have no empathy for what you are going through. It could be even a nap. Then do that.

When things get to the point of overwhelm, and maybe even panic, we often get paralysed trying to solve everything, when we only need to solve the next five minutes.

Putting one step in front of the other gets you to your destination, no matter how fast or slow you do that, and no matter the destination.

Self-Care Highlight: The Anchor Breath

Our self-care activity is simple and effective. We can often forget to breathe when the world is closing in. If your nervous system is running the show, you cannot "logic" your way back to calm. You have to start with your body. When everything else feels out of control, the following steps are within your control.

1. Put one hand on your chest. Feel the physical connection to yourself.

2. Take a slow breath. In through your nose (count to 4), hold for 4, and out through your mouth for 4.

3. Say to yourself: "I am allowed to pause."

4. Allow the overwhelm or anxiety to leave your body. Feel it traveling down your body, out through your toes and into the ground (where it cannot hurt anyone).

5. Repeat 3 times. Doing this exercise gives you time to relax and then think about that next step.

The Expert’s Paradox

Not long ago, my Neuropath took a fall and sprained her wrist. She can recommend to patients in auto mode - what to do if they've sprained their wrist. And yet, in the moment of shock and pain, she completely blanked.

The receptionist at her clinic looked up at her and said, "Marisa, sit... I will get the Arnica."

Marisa is literally the person who would pack the Arnica and herbs for her patients. But in that moment, her brain was not in "expert mode." It was in overwhelm and shock. It was in "ow, what the heck just happened" mode.

That was a huge reminder for me. When we are overwhelmed even the tools, we know worked in the past, can slip right out of our hands. Even Coaches need support to get through what life throws at them - we're human too.

The Science of the "Sprain"

In the world of physical recovery, a grade 2 wrist sprain (a partial tear) usually takes 4 to 6 weeks to heal. During that time, you are told to use the RICE method: Rest, Ice, Compression, and Elevation. You are told to avoid heavy lifting and to use a brace for support.

Emotional and mental "sprains" are no different. When life knocks you sideways, you cannot expect to function at 100% capacity immediately. You need the emotional equivalent of a splint - something to hold you steady while the internal "ligaments" knit back together.

For me, that meant admitting that even though I am the coach, I needed to be the client in 2025 not just for my sake, but so I could be there to support my mum and my teen as they deserved to be supported.

Finding Our Way Forward: The Power of Mind Shifting

Regarding my teen and the overwhelm I was experiencing; I did what I teach (and what I sometimes forget I am allowed to do). I reached out for support.

1. I reminded myself it was OK to be a client. I needed to tap into the resources on offer to me rather than trying to white-knuckle it alone.

2. I allowed my colleagues to coach me. We did a Mind Shifting session together. This process, created by Stevie Kents, allows you to clear the fog, calm the noise, so you can hear your own inner wisdom.

3. The Result: It enabled me to realise I am not failing as a mum. My inner wisdom surfaced, allowing me to calmly work out the actual next steps for my teen, rather than reacting from a place of fear.

Support is not a luxury. It is a stabilizer. Whether it is through NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming), Timeline Therapy, Mind Shifting or Somatic coaching, getting outside your own head is often the only way to see the path forward.

I booked an appointment with a psychologist who specialised in supporting teens with similar circumstances. That one step helped me better understand what my teen might be going through and gave me practical tools to support her. In my overwhelmed state, it genuinely hadn't occurred to me. Once the fog and noise cleared through a Mind Shifting session, I could finally see it as a calm, logical next step. And I think it saved our relationship and helped put it back on track.

Summary

• Life happens: You can't pick when those in your life need your support. Shift course with the help of your village - family, friends, partner or professionals.

• The Privacy Gap: Parenting 14+ year olds in Australia comes with unique challenges regarding medical visibility. You are not alone in finding this hard.

• The Expert’s Sprained Wrist: Even experts forget their tools when they are in pain. It is okay to need a reminder and find the support you need in this moment.

• Mind Shifting Works: Clearing the emotional fog allows your inner wisdom to take the lead again.

Takeaway

·You do not need to have it all figured out. You just need your next step - and the right support to help you find it.

Next Steps

If you are tired of holding it all together and feel like you are fumbling in the dark, let’s make it easy to get the support you need:

• Book a Virtual Coffee: No pressure, just a real chat with a coach who gets it. Book here.

• Join our Community: Join the Women Finding Me Again Facebook group for a safe space to share and grow: Join the Group.

• Learn more about Mind Shifting: See how this approach can help you clear the noise: Mind Shift Coaching.

You have got this, but you do not have to do it alone.